Faith & Mercy
By Syamasundara dasa
My letter was now five days late. Acarya Ratna dasa prabhu had received his and Govinda Bhakata dasa prabhu assured me he had sent them both off together. I was in anxiety; "Not even a blade of grass moves without Krishnas sanction.", had I in some way displeased my Gurudeva? Where was my letter?
It was a sunny morning, Jagad Mohini and I were on the bus traveling back from the nearest supermarket nine miles away in Lampeter. The road was winding in and out and up and down the scenic Welsh countryside. This particular morning (for a change) my chanting was vibrant and seemed full of life. Unfortunately my chanting is usually mechanical, half-hearted, not chanting at all really, but this particular morning was different. So many realizations were flooding into my mind and suddenly it hit me, I turned to my wife and said "Gurudeva is really pouring his mercy on Wales.". I realized that I did not need this physical thing, a letter in order to have a relationship with my Gurudeva, but that our relationship is going on on a deeper level. I realized that esoterically Gurudeva had already answered all my questions and that Sri Guru is always with us. As long as we are following, determined and faithful, then internally we can have a tangible connection with him. I had learned a valuable lesson, I turned to my wife once more and said "My letter has arrived."
When we arrived home, sure enough the letter was there. As I read the letter I became so enthusiastic: "When I come to England I will be so happy to come and visit you in Wales. Contact Govinda Bhakata prabhu and make a very good program."
Gurudeva really was pouring his mercy on Wales. I immediately telephoned Govinda Bhakata dasa prabhu. He said I should come to a meeting they were having there the next day at 1pm.
I set off at 4.30 in the morning and walked five miles in the rain and darkness to reach Aberaeron for 5.30 in the hope of thumbing a ride to the train station. The train was due to leave at 7.00 and somehow or other I had to be on it. The clock was ticking, the roads were bare and what few cars there were did not want to stop. It was now 6.30 and not a car in sight and I began to lose hope and started to walk away. Something inside me refused to let this happen and I just stood still, took shelter of the Holy Name and prayed. Just then a lorry came along and stopped, I jumped in and off we set. I was doubtful that we could travel the twenty or so miles in just half an hour but the time passed so quickly as the lorry driver and I talked. He was a Christian and had some sympathy with me as I spoke about the necessity of saintly persons to guide us in this world. He put his foot down and even drove out of his way dropping me off at the train station entrance, "Faith can move mountains." he said as I left. "Hare Krishna!" I replied. I stepped on the train and the doors shut immediately behind me.
I was trying to arrange for Gurudeva to stay for about two days in between Bath and Birmingham, but it was not a positive outcome. Gurudevas health and the travelling to Wales were issues that were raised and I left Birmingham feeling determined but doubtful.
Govinda Bhakata dasa prabhu advised me to look for accommodation and facilities to see if it could be possible. The next day whilst my wife Jagad Mohini and I were taking a morning stroll in the countryside behind where we live, she noticed a Disabled Holiday Home, and suggested we take a look at it. Inside we found the cleaner whom my wife knew because we received a cow from her on Gurudevas appearance day. It had a big hall and looked like a good spot having 19 beds. We went to see the trustee who lived around the corner in a house called Dolfor. I then realized that on my letter from Gurudeva which had been five days late, someone had written on the envelope "Delivered in error to Dolfor". This seemed too amazing. Is the Master of all Mystics dancing in my village or am I letting my imagination run away with me? My letter from Gurudeva had been delivered to this piece of posting it through my letter box!
We picked up Haridasa and Gopi up from school and tried to think of somewhere to accommodate the devotees nearby. Just then our daughter Gopi passed me a picture she had done at school of Srila Gurudeva. The picture had been drawn on the back of a TYGLYN HOLIDAY VILLAGE booking form. My wife went there immediately and they said we could have twelve bungalows.
I contacted Govinda Bhakata dasa prabhu and told him we had a venue and accommodation. He suggested I ring Mathura, India and find out whether Gurudeva really wants to come to Wales. He needed confirmation.
I spoke with Vrajanatha dasa prabhu who assured me that Gurudeva wanted to come to Wales and that Ramanatha and Caru Chandrika had just left India and that they would help. Vrajanatha also asked me to contact Govinda Bhakata dasa prabhu and ask him to ring Mathura. Later that evening I rang Govinda Bhakata dasa prabhu and feeling confident that Gurudeva was coming, I spoke in a positive way about Wales. However, Govinda Bhakata dasa prabhu did not seem as enthusiastic and so it was back to square one.
The seconds, minutes, hours and days passed by and it seemed like those who hold the positions had decided that Gurudeva wasnt coming here. I became perplexed. Why would Gurudeva ask me to contact Govinda Bhakata dasa prabhu, who told me to ring Mathura for verification, then get verification and then nothing happen? Why be led up the garden path? Last year I had told Gurudeva that I wanted a personal relationship with him and not through any institution and he reassured me that this is also what he wanted. This year by his instruction I was being forced to act in accordance with the institution. It was very quiet. It didnt look like Gurudeva was coming. I thought about why Gurudeva would give me an instruction to weaken my faith. My wife however was strong in her faith. She said, "Birmingham will fall through and Gurudeva will come here for the whole week, just you wait and see."
If only I had taken shelter of the Holy Name!
If only I had more faith in you Gurudeva!
If only I had been able to see just one week into the future!
Please forgive me Gurudeva for doubting you.
I was sat in the chair by the telephone one week later wondering still if it was possible. Just then Govinda Bhakata dasa prabhu rang. Birmingham had fallen through and they were all on their way to Wales, Madan Mohan and Vishaka, Venu Gopal, Syama Priya and Govinda Bhakata. They checked out the accommodation and hall and said that this was the place, it was on, Gurudeva was coming to Wales. Srila Gurudeva Ki Jaya! He who has life can preach!
Ramanatha and Caru Chandrika organized the preaching. They were so strong and selfless in their desire to let Wales know that Sri Guru is here. In the two weeks leading up to Gurudevas arrival in Wales they organized Nama Hatta programs, hari-namas and book distribution in all the nearby towns and villages. I imagined this is what it must have been like in the sixties when Srila Prabhupada was present. The hari-namas were ecstatic, Aberystwyth lit up like a candle, Manohara-lalas sweet singing and Jayadvaita and Radha Ramana prabhus musical accompaniment had on-lookers foot tapping and shoulder swaying. I felt like this is the beginning of something so big. PRABHUPADA II the sequel "GURUDEVA".
Haladara dasa prabhu was seeing to advertising and got an interview in the local paper with photographs of the hari-nama party. Our house had become a busy temple and my wife was constantly on the go cooking for all the devotees. I am very proud to have such a simple dedicated Krishna conscious wife. She was the backbone of all our activities here in Wales.
Whilst walking about checking out the car parking facilities we noticed the hotel. Acaraya Ratna dasa prabhu stole the show at this point and got an unbelievable deal deal out of the owners. He waltzed into the ballroom to talk to the owner, gave him an offer and then turned saying he had other places to look at, then shot out before the owner had time to even think. He then let him stew for two days before telephoning and getting the desired result. Going round to pay the hotel owner on Acaraya Ratnas horse and cart and arranging horse and cart treks to the sea and back for the hotel punters was the icing on the cake. Anyone wishing to buy a horse should contact Acaraya Ratna dasa prabhu.
Everything was going well, Halidars sisters were getting involved in the Nama Hatta programs and preaching was successful. Caru Chanrdika and Ramanatha were distributing so many books and leaflets. Money was starting to come in and devotees were beginning to arrive.
Ananga-devi dasi and Radha-ramana dasa were seeing to the hotel running, the flowers, posters and Gurudevas room. In fact I was worried Ananga had too many things to see to, but she was so organized and on the ball that my worries melted as she took on more and more of the responsibilities. All the devotees here in Wales excelled and it is a testimony to Srila Gurudevas potency how lovingly and personally he reciprocates with all of his disciples, bringing out our better qualities to leave us all enthusiastic for bhakti.
The seven days in Wales went well and the devotees were all happy and encouraged. The cooking was left to the brahmacaris from Birmingham, and it was because of their humility, tolerance and dedication that the whole week was such a success.
Srila Gurudeva has said that he wants a centre here in Wales, book distribution, hari-nama and preaching. The main thing is unity. If we can work together then great things can be achieved. At the airport just before Gurudeva left, on behalf of the Welsh yatra I invited him back here next year. He replied very confidently, "Certainly I will come."