I have been with Srila Prabhupada for one year. I have become accustomed to Srila Prabhupada's transcendental rhythms. At times as I sat in my quarters I would hear the sweet sound of the harmonium coming from Srila Prabhupada's room. I knew I could invite any devotees who happened to be nearby into Prabhupada's room while His Divine Grace sang, but today no one else was around. So I went into his room and offered my humble obeisances. As I sat up I was filled with the nectar of Srila Prabhupada melodious bhajan. Everyone was put into ecstasy just by hearing him play the harmonium adding the sound of his voice softened my heart of stone. I sat there quietly listening to him, not moving. I didn't want to create any distraction when he was in these moods. It amazed me how he could have so many responsibilities but was always able to sit in his room and chant rounds, do bhajans and read his books.
After a minute He looked up from the harmonium and nodded to me. I knew that meant to get His karatals and accompany Him. He continued for some time. When He was finished I said, "Srila Prabhupada, your kirtan and bhajans are always different from any others I have heard." He started laughing and replied, "Yes, I have my own style of chanting."
Of course Srila Prabhupada's style was sometimes imitated but never duplicated. After all who could create an international society by chanting under a tree.
On my first tour of India, fall and winter of 1972, Malati devi did some cooking for Srila Prabhupada. She was the wife of Shyamasundar dasa, Srila Prabhupada's secretary. They had a daughter named Sarasvati who was about 3 years old at the time. She was the most fortunate little girl. She was the only person I knew who was able to go in and out of Srila Prabhupada's quarters unannounced.
She seemed to pop up out of nowhere, like a tiny Narada Muni, in different temples around the world. She would always wind up in Prabhupada's room for a few moments, then as quickly as she appeared, she disappeared. He enjoyed her company. Sometimes she would sit on his lap. Other times he would give her some difficulty, teasing her affectionately like a grandfather might. One thing about her, she always had prasadam in her hands or mouth. Srila Prabhupada observed this and sometimes he supplied her with sweets from a container on his desk.
One day she walked into the room as I was massaging Srila Prabhupada. As usual she was eating. Srila Prabhupada started laughing. He said, "You are always eating. You know what you remind me of Sarasvati?" She looked at Him with her mouth full of food and shook her head indicating she had no idea. "You remind me of New York City-- the garbage trucks." He said, "Do you know the garbage trucks in New York City? She nodded yes. Prabhupada continued, "In New York City they have these big garbage trucks. They go down the street and workers put the garbage in." At this point Srila Prabhupada stretched His arms out wide, one over head and the other towards the floor. "They go down the street and put garbage inside the big mouth of the truck and then the truck goes zzzzzzzzuuuuummmmmmmmmmm and it closes and the truck eats it. Then it goes iiiimmmmmmm and opens back up. Like this."
Exclaiming this, He imitated the up and down crunching movement of the jaws of the garbage truck extending His arms in an opening and closing motion. "Your mouth is just like that. You are always putting things in. Just like the garbage trucks in New York."
He amused her, but just as quickly as she appeared Sarasvati disappeared. Perhaps she went to get more prasadam from her mataji. I continued massaging Srila Prabhupada, amazed again by His greatness. I wondered what pious activities she must have performed to be able to play with His Divine Grace on such an intimate level. My getting to witness Srila Prabhupada's lila was certainly a sign of His causeless mercy. Srila Prabhupada's affectionate playfulness continues to soften this stone heart.
Going on a morning walk with Srila Prabhupada was never dull. Sometimes His Divine Grace wouldn't say a word, chanting japa throughout the walk. This could be disappointing for some disciples who may not get such an opportunity often. They might ask a question, hoping to get Srila Prabhupada engaged in debate or conversation, but this was risky business. Srila Prabhupada was not subject to our whims. Sometimes He would give a short response to such questions and continue walking in silence.
Today, however, Srila Prabhupada was in a talkative, humorous mood. Smiling He asked the devotees a question, "Is a devotee simple or crooked?" One devotee answered, "He is simple, Srila Prabhupada." With a rascally gleam in His eye He asked, "Are you sure? Is He simple or crooked?" His disciple again enthusiastically responded, not realizing they had fallen for a trick question, "Yes, a devotee is simple!"
Srila Prabhupada sprung the unexpected punch line, "Actually, the devotee is crooked!" Everyone stood there with their mouths gaping. Srila Prabhupada explained, "Take me for example, I came to your country and everyone was eating meat, taking intoxication, doing so much nonsense. I tricked everyone. I've tricked all of you into becoming Krishna Conscious. So, in that sense the devotee must be crooked, because he must be able to trick. Just like I have tricked everyone. No one wanted Krishna Consciousness, but I have tricked you."
Srila Prabhupada is the Acarya. He teaches us by example. He demonstrated His art by tricking us again on the morning walk.
Entering Srila Prabhupada's quarters was always an enlightening experience. Sometimes Srila Prabhupada sat and read His books. Whenever He read it seemed as if someone else had written His books because He didn't read with the mind of an author who might be looking for editing mistakes or grammatical errors. He read them with the relish of a pure devotee reading the pastimes of the Supreme Lord to whom He was completely attached.
One day in Los Angeles I went into His room to perform my duties and He was sitting & reading "Bhagavad Gita As It Is". After I offered obeisances He looked at me and said, "If you just read this one book and understand, you will become Krishna Conscious in this very life." A few months later when I went into His room, He was reading "Nectar of Devotion". He looked at me and said, "This book is so nice. Just by reading this one book you can become Krishna Conscious."
Srila Prabhupada teaches us by example. He does everything He asks us to do. He requests us to read His book and He does, too.
Tonight Srila Prabhupada spoke at the University of California, at Berkeley penetrating the heart of the neo-intellectual hippie capital. The San Francisco
devotees enthusiastically received Him and relished His lecture. They had prepared barrels of popcorn and were distributing it following Srila Prabhupada's lecture.
Srila Prabhupada asked, "What is that?" Jayananda, who had been instrumental in cooking and distributing popcorn prasadam on street sankirtan in Berkeley for some time, said, "Popcorn Srila Prabhupada, would You like some?" Srila Prabhupada said inquisitively, "Yes, give me some."
The devotees distributed popcorn in little popcorn bags printed with the "Hare Krsna" mantra. Srila Prabhupada ate the fluffy spiced kernels with great relish and said, " Oh, this is nice". All the devotees, especially those who cooked and distributed the prasadam, felt so much pleasure. Now they were sure their offerings had been accepted and their lives were successful. When Srila Prabhupada finished eating the popcorn, He endeared Himself to all the Vaisnavas present by contentedly leaving His hand in the little popcorn bag. It was sweet. All the devotee's attention hung on each of Srila Prabhupada's movements. The childlike action of His Divine Grace continued to enthuse the hearts of the devotees.
Overjoyed the devotees ecstatically performed Hare Nama Sankirtan on Telegraph Avenue, a place famous for its hippie inhabitants. On the way home, Srila Prabhupada continued to enthuse the devotees by driving slowly past the sankirtan party. All the devotees blissfully chanted and energetically danced being encouraged by Srila Prabhupada's present supervision.
The next night Srila Prabhupada had another preaching engagement. This time the devotees brought Srila Prabhupada popcorn and offered it to Him. Srila Prabhupada said, "No, I am old. I cannot do things like that very often. It is good, but it is very difficult for me to digest." He refused saying, " It is very good. I like it."
Jai Srila Prabhupada!
YS, Srutakirti dasa and Kusa devi dasi (yes, I was also present)
Whenever there is privacy and the weather is nice, Srila Prabhupada takes His massage outside with His back to the morning sun regardless of location. Often times His Divine Grace has said, "The morning sun gives you energy and the afternoon sun takes it away." Today is a beautiful sunny day and Srila Prabhupada has decided to take massage in "His favorite place", the garden. After I placed the mat on the grass with sandalwood and mustard oil alongside it, Srila Prabhupada sat down cross-legged.
Today something out of the ordinary occurred. While massaging Srila Prabhupada's back a kitten crawled under the gate. Perhaps the kitten wanted to get some association with the pure devotee. This little fuzzy thing started licking Srila Prabhupada's back and affectionately rubbing his fur against His Divine Grace. Much to my surprise Srila Prabhupada allowed this to go on for a few minutes.
Finally, Srila Prabhupada said, "That's all, take him out.". Quickly, I grabbed the cat and put him over the fence. Being very small and extremely determined to get more association the kitten immediately crawled under the gate, again...... and again...... and again...... Three times he came in and three times I dropped him over the fence.
Finally I found some cinder blocks and put them along the bottom of the gate. The cat could no longer sneak under and get another taste of His Divine Grace. Even though the cat was thwarted, he cried loudly meowing outside the gate for the duration of Srila Prabhupada's massage. Howling, he lamented his misfortune. I learned something from that kitten: I should be so eager for the association of the pure devotee.
Just see how even a moment's association with the pure devotee can change the life of even a little animal. The cat must have been attracted by the transcendental nature of Srila Prabhupada. He wanted to bathe in Prabhupada's nectar no matter what obstacles were placed before Him. I pray that someday I will be as determined as that kitten to associate with my Guru Maharaja in loving service.
Today Srila Prabhupada described some of the differences between Vedic civilization and the western civilization. "Boys and girls" He said, "Now a man, he wants to do something. He sees some woman and says 'I'll get that woman'. He'll go up to her and say, 'What are you doing? Why don't we go out?' "
When we were young," He said, "The same desires were there. The desires haven't changed at all. We also had desires like that. You see a girl, you become attracted. But the culture was there. The culture was so strict you couldn't even look at her, what to speak of talking to her or making some proposition. Everything was the same, except the culture. Now, there is no culture. You just go up and say anything you want. We had all these desires, talking like school children but you could never approach a woman. It was unheard of. You wouldn't think of it."
Srila Prabhupada left Vrindaban Dhama and the Vedic culture to save us from our so-called advanced civilization. All Glories to Srila Prabhupada!
At around 11:00 a.m. Srila Prabhupada would commence his morning massage for about one and a half hours. There were no hard and fast rules for the length of time Srila Prabhupada took massage. Sometimes during massage Srila Prabhupada would get very busy. His secretary would read him the mail and take dictation for replies. Also his Sanskrit editor might come in with questions regarding Srila Prabhupada's morning translation work.
One day during massage the Sanskrit editor came in and out of Srila Prabhupada's room several times. The first time he entered he carefully offered his obeisances. The next few times he entered he knelt quickly, momentarily touched his head to the floor and hastily sat up and asked questions. Again he left the room. The next time he entered the same thing happened. As he sat up, Srila Prabhupada chastised him saying, "What is this hatchet? You pay your obeisances. This hatchet is not good".
Srila Prabhupada would always care for his disciples. He protected us from making careless offense. This incident happened 22 years ago. I was never sure what Prabhupada meant by the word "hatchet". I know that part of the meaning was the abrupt quick hacking motion one associates with that particular tool.
As I am writing, I see another meaning to the word. Our devotional creeper is very fragile. While rendering personal service to the spiritual master, we can easily damage our devotional creeper by carelessly swinging our hatchet- like egos. Krishna Conscious means we must be conscious of our activities at all times and never take short cuts respecting our Guru Maharaja...
All Glories to Srila Prabhupada, the most expert gardener lovingly tending our devotional creeper! Jai Srila Prabhupada!
During the two years I personally served His Divine Grace, he spoke about retiring from management duties many times to concentrate on translating the scriptures for humanity at large. My first experience was as follows:
At about 9:00 this morning, Srila Prabhupada called me into his room and told me to call Karandhara. This happened often while we were in New Dwarka. Srila Prabhupada seemed to have great faith in Karandhara's abilities. I remember Srila Prabhupada praised Karandhara as he pointed to the concrete stairs on the way to the garden that Karandhara fixed, "Karandhara can do anything". If we were in L.A. and a problem arose, Srila Prabhupada would call for Karandhara feeling confident that he could solve anything.
When Karandhara arrived Srila Prabhupada stunned him by saying, "I don't want to be involved in management so much. I want to translate books." Karandhara answered enthusiastically, "Yes, I can do all of your secretarial work from here and you can stay here to translate. We'll keep everything very nice for you." Srila Prabhupada said, "Yes! We'll do it immediately. I want to have no business. No more business. No more management. You handle all of my affairs for me."
Karandhara left the room, ready to organize Iskcon from his office on Watseka Ave. I thought, "This is amazing. Prabhupada is going let the GBC run the society. New Dwarka was perfect. It had all facility for Srila Prabhupada. He could stay here for years and translate all day if he wanted. Srila Prabhupada did say that his garden here was his favorite place."
It is now 10:00 a.m. Srila Prabhupada rang his bell. I paid my obeisances as I entered Srila Prabhupada's quarters, but before I could raise my head from the floor he said, "Call Karandhara." When Karandhara entered the room he offered obeisances. As he did Srila Prabhupada noticed a letter sticking out of Karandhara's kurta pocket. Srila Prabhupada's eyes grew large. "What is that? he said. "Oh! It is a letter for you, Srila Prabhupada", Karandhara replied. "Open it", Srila Prabhupada said.
Karandhara opened and read the letter to Srila Prabhupada. It was a typical letter from a senior disciple, managing a temple from somewhere in the world. Srila Prabhupada listened intently and then dictated a reply.
Srila Prabhupada's retirement lasted for a little over an hour. It was the first retirement I had experienced, but not the last. Srila Prabhupada relished translating Srimad Bhagavatam for us. He also relished teaching his children how to walk on the spiritual path. His patience was endless. On a daily basis he picked us up as we stumbled, encouraged us to try to walk again. No matter how much he dreamed of retirement he would not leave us alone until we were able to walk on our own. The time has come for us to walk.
Jai Srila Prabhupada!
Srila Prabhupada has been very ill for several weeks. It has been a very difficult time. His eating has been almost nil and he is requiring assistance to walk. After much time improvement is being made to the relief of all of his disciples.
Some of the GBC members have been meeting. Their discussions are focused on relieving Srila Prabhupada of his management responsibilities. They feel if they can efficiently carry on, then Srila Prabhupada would be relieved. They are hoping his health will improve if he doesn't have to be concerned with daily management of Iskcon.
They called for a meeting in Srila Prabhupada's presence. They began saying, "Srila Prabhupada, we've decided that we can handle all the management, and you can be free to do your translating work. You don't have to worry about managing the society. We are competent to do it." Srila Prabhupada became very angry. He said, "When I want you to manage, when I want to stop managing, I'll stop. Don't tell your spiritual master when to give up the management. Who do you think you are telling your spiritual master that he doesn't have to manage any more? I'm quite fit to know when I don't want to manage. When I decide I don't want to do it, then I'll stop managing. That is up to me to decide. Not for you." Meeting adjourned!
This evening Srila Prabhupada is speaking in his sitting room. He has been doing it regularly since his arrival. Some of the local residents bring offerings of fruits and flowers and place them by his lotus feet. Suddenly, in the middle of Srila Prabhupada's lecture a monkey darts into the room lunging for the bananas. Visaka quickly threw her chaddar over the monkey and tugged at the bananas as he ran past her. She managed to get most of the bananas, but within a few seconds the monkey was gone with a prize banana in his hand.
Srila Prabhupada said, "Just see how intelligent this monkey is. This shows that in their own respect all living entities are intelligent. How long do you think it would have taken you to do that, run in and out of here and get the bananas? This monkey is so intelligent in regards to his eating. He can do it in a few seconds. Practically no one even saw him. He just took the bananas and ran out. This is what it is like in the material world. Everyone is very expert in their own sphere. So, we have to become expert devotees, not expert like the monkeys.
The whole incident lasted about 4 seconds. Even though Srila Prabhupada was in the middle of his lecture he was aware of everything going on around him. Srila Prabhupada was always aware of activities around him. Srila Prabhupada was expert at doing more then one thing at a time.
I have been Srila Prabhupada's personal servant for one month. I am beginning to feel comfortable and knowledgeable in my duties. Little did I know this qualified me for the following setback. As soon as I think I know, oh oh!
This evening Srila Prabhupada called and asked me to prepare some puris, potato chips and hot milk. We were not staying at the temple. We were at a young couple's cottage. They were friends of the devotees. The local devotees spent hours cleaning the house to make it presentable before Srila Prabhupada arrived.
The kitchen facility was not very good. Fortunately, there was ghee on the stove, so a meal could be prepared. Srila Prabhupada had asked for "potato chips". I was anxious to prepare them, but had no experience . Making the puris was easy enough but took some time. It was getting late and I didn't want Srila Prabhupada to have to wait. I peeled some potatoes, sliced them as thin as possible with a potato peeler, and fried them in very hot ghee. They came out mildly resembling potato chips but not exactly like any chips I had ever seen.
I felt very fortunate to be able to serve the living representative of Krsna. Srila Prabhupada was my living deity, the special mercy being he reciprocated with me directly. With affection I rushed to His Divine Grace with a dish of potato chips, one hot puri and a cup of hot milk. Srila Prabhupada pointed to the potato chips and firmly inquired, "What are these?" Bewildered I said, "Potato chips Srila Prabhupada." "They are not chips!" He thundered. "This is not what I wanted."
Seeing my pain he said, "Anyway..... go on, leave it." I felt terrible. This was the first time I had bungled my service to my Guru Maharaja. I felt like dying. The offering had been unacceptable. I went back to the kitchen cooked the next puri. Returning to Srila Prabhupada's quarters I placed the puri on his plate and offered my obeisances. When I sat up he looked at me with a big smile. Assuredly he said, "These are very good. It is all right. They are very nice." I breathed a sigh of relief and replied, "Oh, good! Thank you, Srila Prabhupada."
I was in bliss. I didn't know whether he really liked them or if he just said it to make me feel better. Either way was wonderful. It felt terrific to have someone care about me so much. I made another puri and brought it to him and waited for him to finish. Picking up his plates, I was thrilled to see that he had eaten all of the so-called potato chips. Srila Prabhupada mercifully accepted my bumbling efforts.
Months later while in India, I finally realized that "chips" are the British equivalent of American "French fries". Having limited experience I misunderstood. I realized Srila Prabhupada wanted what I knew as "French fries".
Later, I made Srila Prabhupada's chips according to his instructions, "thin and cripsy". Note the spelling discrepancy. It is not an error. Srila Prabhupada often uses endearing words. I preferred his use of the word "cripsy" for "crispy". It has a crunchier sound to it.
Today Srila Prabhupada arrived and stayed for a few days at the cottage of some of his well wishers. His disciples showed him around the house. Srila Prabhupada sat down and asked, "Is there any prasadam?" There was nothing available. He said, "So, bring some fruit." He said, "Bring something for washing my feet. Bring a towel and some water. This is common etiquette. You should wash a person's feet when they arrive." Srila Prabhupada needs nothing from any of us, but he mercifully showed us the proper way to honor a guest, what to speak of the spiritual master.
The devotees present hurried about preparing the items. As his disciple began bathing his feet Srila Prabhupada said, "Wash up to my knees. This kind of foot bath refreshes one's whole body after traveling."
One very hot day in Vrindavan, Srila Prabhupada again mentioned this same fact after coming back from an engagement. Returning to his quarters, he went directly to the bathroom and washed his feet and legs with cool water. He said, "After going out, doing this the whole body becomes rejuvenated."
He taught us the ancient standard of Vedic etiquette complete with practical application. He enlivens us with this knowledge. Jai Srila Prabhupada!
It was Srila Prabhupada's greatest pleasure to speak about Krishna and His associates 24 hours a day. He relished every opportunity to speak the philosophy of Krishna Consciousness. This contrasted sharply with his economic use of words when it came to his own bodily maintenance. The dichotomy was ecstatic.
Daily Srila Prabhupada took a short nap after taking lunch prasadam. After rising His Divine Grace would walk through my designated area to get to the bathroom. Often times I rested, too. As soon as I heard the sweet sound of his shuffling feet, I would get up and pay my obeisances. Srila Prabhupada walked by saying, "Dab" in a deep voice. By the time he returned to his sitting room it was my duty to go to the kitchen, cut open the coconut, place the gold straw through the opening and place the sweet water on his desk. This was the daily ritual. Every time I heard the word "dab" the same ecstatic opportunity availed itself.
Particularly in Vrindavan, Srila Prabhupada often boasted to guests about how his servant could cook lunch so quickly. He would say, "Srutakirti, he can cook my entire lunch, rice, dahl, chapatis, and three or four subjis, in just 45 minutes." Then he would look at me and say, "Is it not?" Nodding I would respond, "Yes, Srila Prabhupada and I give you massage while the cooking is going on." Now, widening his eyes he said, "Just see, 45 minutes and all bodily maintenance business.... finished. This is Krishna Consciousness. We minimize bodily maintenance as much as possible, so we have more time for devotional service."
Another example that demonstrated Srila Prabhupada's efficiency with minimum effort would takes place in the privacy of his quarters. Srila Prabhupada instructed me without saying a single word. While sitting in his room he would look up at the ceiling fans. If they were on, it meant I should turn them off. Conversely, if they were off... turn them on. Other times, he would look at the French doors. If the curtains were open, I closed them. If they were closed, I opened them. Srila Prabhupada said, "This is the first class servant, he does his service without being asked. The second class servant, you ask him and he does it. The third class servant, you ask him and he does it begrudgingly or doesn't do it at all."
I pray to hear the shuffling of his feet, see his glances, hear his words and get the opportunity to serve him life after life. Srila Prabhupada is Acarya.
Jai Srila Prabhupada!
Today after the morning walk a group of 5 or 6 devotees stood in the downstairs hallway watching Srila Prabhupada walk with his cane up the stairs to his room. As he walked, we were all gratefully chanting, "Jai Srila Prabhupada!"
He turned and endearingly said with a beautiful smile. "I was just thinking, when I was young I would run up the stairs. Now that same desire is there. I still want to run up the stairs but due to this body..... now I can't run. I still want to do all these things, like when I was young. I want to be active but the body is very limiting." He continued walking up the stairs as we paid our heartfelt obeisances.
A light went on in my mind, I realized momentarily how Srila Prabhupada voluntarily accepted so many inconveniences to save us from this foolishly gross bodily conception of life. I witnessed the majesty of Prabhupada's lila while personally serving him but there were many painful periods as well.
My heart ached as we witnessed the suffering His Divine Grace underwent due to willingly accepting the sinful reactions of fallen souls such as myself. The fact that Srila Prabhupada experienced these discomforts does not diminish his greatness but magnifies it. This is the unlimited mercy of the pure devotee. Who can be this magnanimous? He is our ever well wisher having taken the unbearable responsibility to save us from our fallen condition.
Over the next few days I will attempt to describe some of these sweet and bittersweet pastimes of Srila Prabhupada in the hopes that I can meditate upon and appreciate his greatness. I beg forgiveness to all I offend having shared my imperfect perceptions. If I wait till I become perfect before I attempt to glorify our beloved guru I'm afraid all memory may be lost. I recognize my inability to properly glorify our beloved shaktavesh avatar Srila Prabhupada. I realize that His Divine Grace being nitya-siddha wasn't susceptible to any material disease, but still he granted us his merciful association walking amongst us in this land of misery, Martyaloka. He came to deliver us, and he voluntarily came to this place of misery. This is his causeless mercy.
Jai Srila Prabhupada!
While in Bombay one senior disciple showed Srila Prabhupada an appealing post card of Saint Moritz complete with colorful wild flowers and rolling green meadows. It was beautiful. Considerately Srila Prabhupada's devotee said it would be nice to take a break on the long trip between Bombay and New York. Srila Prabhupada could get some rest in Saint Moritz. Anyone having traveled between U.S.A. and India knows it's a bone crunching, grueling trip. Srila Prabhupada had been traveling quite briskly, spending no more than 6-7 days in each location. So, stopping in Saint Moritz appeared to be a gallant proposition.
However another motive for disembarking at Saint Moritz was gold speculation. A few senior men were thinking of fortifying ISKCON's reserves by investing in gold before the price was deregulated. Zurich was just the place for investment in gold bullion. However Srila Prabhupada nipped the idea in the bud.
Saint Moritz is a ski resort area and this time of the year snow lay on the ground as far as the eye could see. The hotel we checked into had a central lobby with an elevator. When one got out of the elevator and entered into a hotel room, it opened up into a spacious three bedroom condo, with a complete kitchen. The large living room had sliding glass doors leading to a verandah that had a fantastic view of the snow covered mountains. By many persons standards it was breathtaking, but not to Srila Prabhupada.
Srila Prabhupada was very regulated. It didn't matter where we were, life would go on like clockwork. Srila Prabhupada's schedule remained constant. This morning was no different. Srila Prabhupada put on his warm saffron hooded coat and prepared to go for his morning walk saying, "We shall go for a walk? Shall we see how cold it is?"
Since we were on the ground floor His Divine Grace opened the sliding glass door to walk on the verandah to the big outdoors. Suddenly a huge whistling blast of ice cold air filled the entire condo. It was blizzard-like. Srila Prabhupada opened his eyes wide and exclaimed, "Ooohhh, this is much too cold!"
Whenever I witnessed these childlike expressions my heart melted with joy. Srila Prabhupada exuded the innocence of a child. While most disciples experienced his powerful determined preaching, I felt fortunate to see Srila Prabhupada's face light up with endearing intimate expression. His Divine Grace felt the cold. He didn't like it, so he said, "We shall walk in the hallway inside the building."
A little arctic blast wasn't going to interfere with Srila Prabhupada's morning walk. So His Divine Grace, Pradyumna and myself headed for the hallway. Now, this presented a different set of problems. Considering this was 1973, the resort was super high tech. It was designed to operate with very little waste of energy. The system was that if someone walked in the halls the lights would automatically go on for a specific amount of time, probably timed exactly to get you into the elevator, then the lights went out automatically. So as we walked up and down the corridor we were required to push various buttons along the way to keep the lights from going out. Otherwise we would have been walking in the dark.
Pradyumna decided to go back into the apartment. Srila Prabhupada and I walked up and down the hallway. I ran from button to button pushing and chanting, pushing and chanting. This went on for about a 1/2 hour when Srila Prabhupada mentioned, "The cold weather has given me an appetite. You can go in a make me some halavah." I replied, "All right Srila Prabhupada, do you want me to wait till after your walk or should I go now?" The lights stayed on for about thirty seconds so I was concerned about the button pushing. Srila Prabhupada humorously retorted, "No, I will walk. You can go make the halavah."
We always loved it when Srila Prabhupada had an appetite. It was a joy to cook for him. When I went in I said to the others, "Srila Prabhupada is still walking in the hall. Someone needs to go out to push the buttons to keep the lights on for him." We all peeked out the door to see Srila Prabhupada chanting, walking and pushing the buttons to keep the lights on. It was quite humorous. Jai Srila Prabhupada!
After leaving San Moritz we spent one day in an exclusive hotel overlooking the river Rhine in Zurich. Srila Prabhupada had a room and his entourage stayed together in the room next door. They were not adjoining rooms. When it was time for his massage I had to go into his room to put on my gumpsa, so I wouldn't walk in the hallway in my gumpsa. When I was finished giving massage, I inadvertently left my bead bag in his room.
The japa beads were not the set Srila Prabhupada chanted on at my initiation two years earlier. Unfortunately, I lost them in New Vrindaban. I considered asking Srila Prabhupada to chant on another set of beads for me but I didn't want to admit how careless I had been. My bead bag was prasadam given to by His Divine Grace. To my delight when I returned to Srila Prabhupada's room I noticed his hand in my bead bag. For the next half hour, I sat and joyfully watched as he chanted on my beads. Again Srila Prabhupada fulfilled my desire without me verbally asking. I waited until he put my bead bag down and took my newly sanctified beads to our quarters. Elated I bragged to the others how I just benefited by a miracle that had just taken place.
From Zurich Airport we headed to San Moritz by way of a luxury train. Srila Prabhupada, myself and a young brahmacari named Jai Hari boarded the train. The others devotees had investment business to attend. The train ride through the Alps was magnificent. Following the contour of the snow covered mountains the train circled continuously in different directions. The awe inspiring scenery had the full attention of Jai Hari and myself. Srila Prabhupada sat and quietly chanted as we pointed out the different scenic views to one another, completely oblivious to our Spiritual Guide sitting beside us.
Breaking our meditation Srila Prabhupada calmly said, "What do they call this place?" Feeling delighted to have the opportunity to answer such a simple question I quickly said, "San Moritz, Srila Prabhupada, Saint Moritz!". He immediately responded, "They may call it Saint Moritz, I call it Saint Hellish. This place is hellish. Look out there. There is no life anywhere, simply branches of trees and snow. There is not a living thing for miles."
Srila Prabhupada had effectively turned our illusion into an opportunity to instruct two of his fledgling disciples. Jai Hari and I spent the rest of the journey with our heads down, quietly chanting and hearing the transcendental sound vibration of the Maha Mantra, just like Srila Prabhupada desired. Being with Srila Prabhupada was the most fortunate position. If you followed his example you knew you were rightly situated.
If you had a question and asked him, the answer you received was the absolute truth. He pacified thousands of disciples regularly, answering their questions, alleviating their fears and engaging them in Krishna's service. Srila Prabhupada, please free me from my attachment to the mountains of maya so that I can hear your kind and gentle instructions.
Jai Srila Prabhupada!
This morning as I was mowing the lawn by the grace of Sri Guru and Gauranga I was able to remember my beloved Srila Prabhupada. I always feel very fortunate especially during such mundane activities to have the opportunity to meditate on my Guru Maharaja.
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This morning Srila Prabhupada took his walk on the temple grounds in Coconut Grove. While walking in the yard he turned to the temple president and asked, "Why everyone else's yards are clean? Here there are only leaves on the ground?"
The devotee responded, "Well, under the leaves there is nothing but dirt. The leaves keep the dirt from rising." Srila Prabhupada remarked, "There are lawns everywhere. Why, here you have dirt?"
The grounds in New Navadwip had always been very nice but this time when Srila Prabhupada arrived they were not being maintained. On a walk in the temple grounds Srila Prabhupada asked, "Why this garden isn't taken care of?" Sukadeva, the temple president, responded, "Srila Prabhupada, there is no one to do it." At the time there where approximately 20 devotees walking along with Srila Prabhupada. He looked around at all of his disciples and said, "How is this? No one to do it."
To make advancement on the path of devotional service one must facilitate the pleasure of the Spiritual Master, then one certainly gets the grace of Krsna. We are dasa dasa anu dasa.
Jai Srila Prabhupada!
The first international festival has taken place here for the Iskcon devotees. The Bengali form of kirtan has had a major influence on many of the devotees. Srila Prabhupada expressed some displeasure about the chanting of so many different mantras. He said, "They can chant their 'Nitai Gaura, Hari Bols', but I will chant Hare Krsna and go back home, Back to Godhead."
Some of the kirtans did get caught up in the 'Hari bols' too much. If we understood the translation maybe we would know what to do. Srila Prabhupada enjoyed chanting the Maha mantra.
Brahmananda Maharaja and I introduced Bengali style of dancing at the kirtans. We picked it up at the Mayapura festival. Many of the devotees love it. Srila Prabhupada has also been seen smiling as he watches the devotees dancing before him. Pradyumna asked him if it was all right to dance like that because some of the devotees thought it was strange. Srila Prabhupada replied, "Yes, of course!"
Srila Prabhupada loves to see his disciples chant "Hare Krishna" and dance in ecstasy.
Jai Srila Prabhupada!
Srila Prabhupada distributed his mercy without distinction. This is the kindness of the pure devotee. On a flight from India to the west, we had a two hour stop over at the Bangkok airport. We had to wait in the transit area.
Srila Prabhupada said to me, "Get my things. I am going to shower." I went to the baggage area, opened Srila Prabhupada's bag, grabbed his lota, towel and fresh change of clothing. It took me a few minutes, then I returned to His Divine Grace. He asked, "Where is the bathroom?" We walked together to the bathroom. Unfortunately there were no bathing facilities.
Srila Prabhupada was never easily discouraged. When he wanted to do something there was no such thing as an obstacle. Assessing the situation he turned to me and said, "All right, I'll take bath from the sink". He put on his gumpsa & with lota in hand he proceeded to pour water over his body again and again. He washed with soap and then rinsed again. I stood by, watching in amazement, as he refreshed himself. He was completely transcendental to all other activities going on around him.
Watching from a corner of the bathroom was the attendant. He had a disturbed look on his face seeing the extra work that was being created for him. He had no idea that he was being benedicted by a Paramahamsa. He was getting the opportunity to do pujari work by the causeless mercy of Srila Prabhupada.
When Srila Prabhupada finished I gave him a towel. He dried himself off and put on a clean dhoti and kurta. After he finished we began walking out of the bathroom together. The attendant approached me. He was obviously complaining to me, although I had no idea what he was saying. While this was going on Srila Prabhupada was laughing. On the way out I said, "Srila Prabhupada I think he is a little upset." Srila Prabhupada replied, "Oh well! I had to take bath. I was feeling very tired."
Being with Srila Prabhupada during travel was always an incredible adventure. He never felt the need to conform to any social conventions. On airplanes he would use the restroom when the seat belt sign was lit. He would take prasadam when we weren't allowed to have our trays down. If anyone said anything to him he ignored them. They would turn to me and I would shrug my shoulders and say, "I can't stop him." They inevitably walked away defeated realizing they were no match for a Vaikuntha person.
Srila Prabhupada influenced everyone he was around. Traveling with him was an enlightening experience. Seeing how Srila Prabhupada was able to lift everyone's spirits to the transcendental realm while he visited temples was ecstatic. However, being with him in planes and airports offered a different opportunity to see how he changed the lives of those who knew nothing about him. It must have been his effulgence. It could be seen, even by a quadruped such as myself. Once a stewardess passing by said, "This man looks very wonderful." Others would ask what they could do for him.
The incident on Venezuela Airlines stands alone, however it was most unique. Srila Prabhupada, Paramahamsa Swami, Nitai dasa and I were traveling from Mexico City to Caracas. I did not prepare any prasadam for the flight but just before we boarded the plane a Vaisnava Indian lady handed me a bag with some puffed rice in it that she made for the trip.
Shortly after takeoff Srila Prabhupada said, "All right, let's take prasadam." I said, "Do you want what is being served on the plane?" He immediately responded, "No, no! We have our prasadam. That's all right." I said, "Okay." I didn't even ask for a plate. I put the tray- table down, unwrapped the aluminum foil and placed the puffed rice before my spiritual master. He immediately started eating. He finished about half of it, although it was not a very large portion. Without even looking at me he said, "All right, now you can take." This is the nectar for which we were always anxious. Srila Prabhupada always took great care of his entourage. This quality was one of many that I greatly appreciated.
Srila Prabhupada sat by the window. He always sat by the window. I was in the middle. I always sat next to Srila Prabhupada, unless I succumbed to the wishes of a GBC member. Paramahamsa was in the aisle seat. I took the puffed rice from His Divine Grace and split the foil down the middle, keeping half for myself and giving the rest to Paramahamsa Swami.
We were happily eating Srila Prabhupada's remnants when a young stewardess walking down the aisle looked at us and spontaneously reached past Paramahamsa and placed her hand in my maha. Grabbing a fistful she tossed it in her mouth and exclaimed, "Oh, this is very good. What is it?" Trying to keep my composure I answered, "It's puffed rice. It's made from rice." Srila Prabhupada was looking at her with a broad smile. Again she said, "Ah, this is very good." "I'm glad you like it," I said, still a little shocked about what she had done. "Are you having anything else to eat?" she inquired.
"Well" I said, "we're vegetarian. Unless there is some fruit, we can't have anything." She eagerly responded, "I will go up to the first class section and get you a basket of fruit." In a moment she was back with fruit and knives. She again asked, "Is there anything else I can get you." Turning to Srila Prabhupada I said, "Prabhupada would you like some milk?" He said, "Yes, hot milk." I said, "Okay, he will have some hot milk and we will also." She quickly went to first class and immediately came back with the hot milk.
I have heard Srila Prabhupada speak in many lectures about Supersoul residing in the heart of the living entity. However I had never experienced His presence before this day. I am convinced that only Supersoul within the stewardess's heart could have inspired her to act in such an unprofessional manner.
Sometimes devotees would offer me money to get a taste of Srila Prabhupada's remnants. (I never took it.) They would beg for the opportunity to do some personal service. Here was this flight attendant boldly going where no one had ever gone before by the mercy of Krishna and His pure devotee.
All Glories to you, Srila Prabhupada for distributing your mercy
to all living entities that come in contact with you.
Wherever the pure devotees resides is Vaikuntha and he distributes his causeless mercy to the fallen conditioned souls whether they like it or not. Srila Prabhupada always kept me smiling while traveling by air because he never changed his habits. In the presence of materialistic persons these activities were sometimes unconventional.
Srila Prabhupada liked to look outside during the takeoffs and landings from his window seat. He seemed to especially enjoy looking out the window upon landing. If we took a long evening flight, Srila Prabhupada's secretary and I would leave our seats next to Srila Prabhupada so he could lie down and take rest. On this particular occasion, Srila Prabhupada's transcendental body was stretched across the seats. His head lay peacefully on a pillow by the window. He appeared completely relaxed, something I still don't know how to do on a plane.
His feet went under the armrest reaching about 10-12 inches into the aisle. They looked so beautiful, with or without saffron socks covering them. This evening his lotus feet were snugly covered. As he rested for about an hour the passengers walked up and down the aisle brushing against his kamala padas. Sometimes when they hit them, he would move slightly, but he never pulled his feet in. He left them there the entire time he rested, benedicting everyone fortunate enough to pass by.
Srila Prabhupada's entourage watched the show from the next row, wondering what these people had done to be given such an opportunity. Perhaps Srila Prabhupada forcibly benedicted them with causeless mercy whether they liked it or not.
Thank you Srila Prabhupada for compelling me to have a glimpse of your unabashed divinity. Please force your benedictions upon me again and again as you have compassionately done so many times in the past.
I have been with Srila Prabhupada for about one year now and I have had the good fortune to massage him every day. I think I have become very efficient and expect that today will be another blissful massage. Srila Prabhupada said, "The Manor is wonderful and when the sun is shining there is no place better."
Srila Prabhupada is sitting on a straw mat directly on the highly polished hardwood floor and along side him are two bottles. The large one is filled with mustard seed oil and the small one contains sandalwood oil. The sun's brilliant rays filter through a series of windows and Srila Prabhupada's golden complexion is effulgently sun drenched. I am sitting behind His Divine Grace rubbing his head with sandalwood oil for it's cooling effect. After massaging his head for about 15 minutes, I moved on to massage Srila Prabhupada's back. Mustard seed oil is used on his body, so I picked up the bottle to put a small amount on my hand.
Many times Srila Prabhupada said, "You can massage my back as hard as you can." He really meant it. It was truly amazing! I could put all of my weight and strength into massaging his back and continue that way for a half hour or more and he never, ever said, "not so hard." Sometimes I would deliberately do it harder than normal, thinking there must be a limit to how hard he likes it. I didn't find such a limit. Srila Prabhupada sat perfectly relaxed during this "passive wrestling" as he called it. He didn't have to brace himself in order to accept my strength. He just sat there, as if nothing were happening at all.
He always enjoyed his massage and today was no different, then I stood up to change positions. As I took a step to the right to massage Srila Prabhupada's chest, I knocked over the bottle of mustard oil. Over the past year His Divine Grace had warned me many times to always keep the lid on the bottle. Unfortunately, sometimes I did and sometimes I didn't. Today I must pay the price. Immediately he yelled, "You fool, you will be intelligent when you are 80. Go get a cup and bring it here." I ran out of the room, reappearing with a stainless steel katori. Srila Prabhupada said, "All right, put your hand in the oil and then scrape it into the cup." The two of us sat there until all of the oil from the floor was in the metal cup. "Now use that oil to finish the massage," he said. Srila Prabhupada never, never wasted anything. More about that in a later pastime.
Now, the atmosphere seemed almost too quiet as I continued to massage Srila Prabhupada. I felt that he was angry because of my foolishness, so I began to think, "What can I say to mitigate my offense?" I mulled over it again and again finally I got up the nerve & blurted out, "Thank you very much Srila Prabhupada, I thought it would take much longer for me to become intelligent." Srila Prabhupada started laughing loudly. "Yes" he said, "that is an old phrase they would say in India when someone did something foolish. 'You'll be intelligent when you are 80.'"
Srila Prabhupada is a pure devotee & Krishna is obliged to keep the word of His devotee. I have no chance of ever becoming Krishna Conscious but if I can just live to be 80, I am sure, I will finally become intelligent. Real intelligence is to be Krishna Conscious, so I pray to live to be 80 and live up to the expectations of my beloved Srila Prabhupada.
Today during Srila Prabhupada's afternoon massage Rebatinandana Swami entered the room with a problem he thought only his spiritual master could solve. He said, "Srila Prabhupada, Shyamasundara is the GBC and he's making all these decisions. I want to accept his authority but I had to come to you because he is not chanting his rounds. I know this for a fact. He doesn't chant any rounds. Also, many of the devotees in the temple find it difficult to follow his authority. I wanted to know how we should handle this."
Srila Prabhupada was silent for a moment and then replied, "Shyamasundara, he is very busy. Arjuna when he was fighting the battle of Kuruksetra, he did not chant his 16 rounds. When you are fighting a battle, where is the time to chant your rounds? So, perhaps Shyamasundara is too busy. Anyway, you should see it like that. As long as he is in charge, you should follow, and encourage him to chant if he is not chanting."
In Calcutta during an afternoon massage a devotee entered the room and asked what should be done because Gargamuni Maharaja, the temple administrator was not chanting his rounds. Srila Prabhupada responded, "He should not be in office. He may be materially qualified in so many ways but it is not enough. In management one has to have his transcendental aspect. One has to be following the regulative principles and chanting, otherwise it is simply useless just to have some management knowledge."
Srila Prabhupada did not remove him from office at that time. He is the acarya and is able to make adjustments according to time, place and circumstance. We can see this in letters and hear it in conversations. Sometimes instructions in a letter were meant only for the person receiving the letter. It was not meant to be general policy. For the absolute truth we can read his books. He often called them "law books for the next 10,000 years." I am beginning to realize that Srila Prabhupada's personal presence on this planet was so potent that he could carry fallen souls such as myself and keep us engaged in Krishna's service, even when we were not following his regulations strictly. Since his departure it has become most apparent to me that if I want to associate with him and perform devotional service I must follow his instructions strictly. This may seem like common sense to most devotees but to me it is a revelation.
Srila Prabhupada lives eternally in his instructions and his followers live with him. Srila Prabhupada, please engage me in your service.
I have been with Srila Prabhupada for 5 weeks, cooking for him and massaging his transcendental body daily. I will never understand why I was given this great fortune. Today something new has happened in my service. Yamuna devi is in Srila Prabhupada's kitchen preparing lunch. This was always one of my main services. After all, His Divine Grace taught me how to use the cooker in Dallas for two days. I learned very quickly how fortunate I was. It took so long to do anything in India.
After massaging Srila Prabhupada I took a bath and dressed. I didn't know what to do with myself since I didn't have to get his lunch ready. I started walking around the temple compound. I had never been there before and felt a little lost both in my service and in India. It was so different being in Vrindaban. I was trying to appreciate my good fortune being in Krishna's home and with his pure devotee.
I finally made my way to Srila Prabhupada's kitchen. I walked into the kitchen and offered obeisances. I never considered how offensive I was to take such liberties. Srila Prabhupada was sitting there taking prasadam. It was the very same spot he stayed for years devising his plan to conquer the world with Krishna Consciousness. He looked up with a beautiful glance and asked, "So, you have taken prasadam?" "No," I replied, "I have just taken bath." Srila Prabhupada responded charmingly, "Oh, so you haven't taken prasadam. Yamuna, fix him a plate of prasadam." I said, "No, that's all right. I will wait until you are finished." He said, "No. Sit down and take prasadam."
I happily complied with his instruction, rascal that I was. I now realize it was one of the sweetest moments of my life. Here I was taking prasadam with Srila Prabhupada. Just the two of us. In Vrindaban. At Radha Damodara Temple. The mercy of the pure devotee has no limit.
Neither was I prepared for what followed. I realized that I had never tasted prasadam before. Also, I have never cooked anything that was fit to be offered. Yamuna devi is an empowered devotee of the Lord, sent here so that Srila Prabhupada could be fed sumptuously. Each and every preparation tasted incredible. She made chapatis cooking them so perfectly on the stove. The subjis were definitely from the spiritual world. Sitting there with Srila Prabhupada I realized what a disservice I had been performing by cooking for him. Sometimes he would say that I cooked "nice American prasadam." Now I understood what he meant by that. Yamuna's cooking was transcendental.
It seemed like I had never eaten before. As we were finishing Srila Prabhupada said, "So, you like?" I enthusiastically replied, "Yes, Srila Prabhupada. Very much." He smiled and said, "So, today she has fixed your lunch. Now, tomorrow you cook for her. This is the Vedic custom. Today she has done some service for you, now tomorrow you must serve her." I said, "Oh, yes Prabhupada."
At other times Srila Prabhupada said, "One has to always be ready to serve a person, not simply you are always accepting service. You call someone 'prabhu'. Prabhu means master. What is the question of you accepting service from your master. You are servant and you are calling them prabhu and accepting so much service from your master. So, I am calling you 'prabhu'. It means I must render service. This attitude must be there, that I am everyone's servant because I am calling everyone 'prabhu'."
I never did cook for Yamuna devi. That would not have been of service. It would have been an austerity for her to have to eat my "American prasadam". Mataji, please forgive me for accepting service from you. Srila Prabhupada, please forgive me for not following your instructions. I pray to be given the ability to serve my spiritual master with the expertise of a surrendered soul, such as Yamuna devi dasi.